Marriage in Islam
Nature has so arranged that man and woman are attracted to each other.
This natural attraction binds them together and they lead a common life and form
a family. This natural tendency, the instinct of sex, should be guided to the
right direction so that it may be utilized in the service of humanity. Though
the common life of a husband and wife originates from the sexual instinct, it
gradually develops into a deep, spiritual, sentimental, social and economic
relationship. That is what Islam calls matrimony.
Islam has attached great importance to the question of marriage in its
social system. In the Holy Qur'an and the sayings of the Holy Prophet we fmd
that marriage has been greatly encouraged. Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.)
said;
"No institution of Islam is liked by Allah more than that of
marriage."
The basic objectives of marriage in Islam are, first, securing
a comfortable atmosphere for a husband and wife and, second, producing a new
generation of healthy, faithful and virtuous children.
With regard to the first objective, the Holy Qur'an says:
"One of His signs is that He created for you spouses of your own
species, so that you might find comfort with them. And He put mutual love and
affection in your hearts. Surely in this there are lessons for the the thinking
people" (30:21)
A Muslim husband and wife who follow the teachings of the Holy Qur'an
should always be a source of comfort for each other, Their relationhup should
reach far above that of mere sexual enjoyment and should reach the stage of
cordial friendship accompanied by mutual benevolence.
With regard to the second objective, the Holy Qur'an says:
"He is the Creator of the heavens and the earth. He has given you
partners from among yourselves and, similarly, made the cattle also males and
females. That is how he multiplies you. Nothing can be compared to Him, He is
the All-hearing, the All-seeing." (43:11)
One of the most critical questions connected to marriage and the formation
of the family is that of choosing a spouse. Freedom in choosing a husband or
wife is a principle to which Islam pays much attention. Compatibility between
two parties can exist only if they choose each other out of their own free will
after careful study and without coercion.
According to Islamic law,
the first condition of the validity of a marriage contract is that it should be
proposed by the woman and accepted by the man and both of them should act freely
in this matter. No impositions are allowed in this respect. A young man once
complained to an Imam that his parents were compelling him to marry a girl whom
he did not like, whereas he was interested in another girl. The Imam said to
him: "Marry that girl whom you like," Still, consultation with the parents of
both parties is strongly advised, since marriage establishes a social contract
between two families. Such consultation shows respect for the parents and is
conducive to better understanding between relatives of both sides.
Choosing a suitable spouse is the first step in establishing a sound
family. The Holy Prophet said:
"Marry your equals; choose your partner in life from among them and
select the best mothers for your offspring."
At first glance, this saying from the Holy Prophet may seem racist or
prejudiced.